Interview: Understanding Relapse: Katjijova Breaks Down the Hidden Stages Behind Addiction’s Return

When recovery slips: the warning signs nobody talks about

Psychological Counsellor Marcella Katjijova has urged communities to better understand what really happens when a person who has been sober for weeks, months, or even years finds themselves using again. According to Katjijova, relapse is rarely sudden — it’s a gradual slide through three overlooked but predictable stages: emotional, mental, and physical.

She says the first danger zone is the emotional stage, where stress, grief, trauma, or even daily pressures can overwhelm a person’s coping mechanisms. “It might be a sudden loss, work stress, or unresolved trauma that leaves them unable to process heavy emotions,” Katjijova explains. “In this space, people often start to feel overwhelmed and vulnerable.”

If these feelings go unaddressed, the second stage — the mental relapse — begins. Here, Katjijova says, people start to rationalise risky behaviour: “They tell themselves, ‘I’ve been clean so long, I can handle just one drink, just one hit. I’m stronger now.’ They start glorifying their past control, forgetting how hard it was to get clean.”

When those thoughts win, the final physical relapse follows: the person picks up the substance or behaviour again. Often, it starts small — one drink, one line, one bet — but quickly escalates. “Addiction is about connection,” Katjijova says. “When people lose healthy connections, they can easily reconnect with their addiction instead. And the cycle restarts, sometimes even worse than before.”

She warns that relapse can be even more dangerous than the original addiction. Many people quickly return to — or surpass — the level they were at when they stopped, falling harder and risking deeper damage to their families, jobs, or studies.

Katjijova adds that some switch addictions to convince themselves they’re “better.” For example, someone who quit drugs may start drinking heavily, or a former gambler might begin risky shopping habits — all in search of the same high.

Her advice? Spot the signs early. “Relapse prevention starts with recognising emotional stressors and seeking help before the mental bargaining begins,” she says. “Counselling, honest conversations, and community support can break the pattern.”